Being married for five years and knowing each other for 11 years, it’s no shock that Dean and I have ups and downs in our relationship.
Sometimes when I’m frustrated with him, I’ll think back to my marriage vows and remind myself that we’re in it for the long haul.
Recently I was thinking about how some of my marriage vows don’t apply to my everyday life. Like the vow about sickness and health – for the most part we’re healthy – sickness isn’t something our family faces on a day to day basis (obviously that could change at any moment, but in our today this isn’t something that we struggle with daily). Yes, the vows we committed are all encompassing and good vows that span a lifetime but if I could, sometimes I think I’d like to rewrite my vows to include some more specific, everyday promises.
Jason Dean, I promise to love you every day and tell you or show you every day. I promise to make you a priority and choose you above other things that can steal my time. I promise to tell you what a great daddy you are. I promise to give you time to do things you want to do (golf, computer stuff) so that you can have your own individual time without complaint. I promise to date you each month. I promise to laugh at your jokes. I promise to resolve our fights quickly and fairly and not give you the silent treatment. I promise to be respectful of your ideas and your time. I promise to be an open book with you – to be as true as I can be with you. I promise to tell you more positives to build you up than nag you with complaints.
Sometimes I need the reminder to be more intentional in my marriage and how I treat my husband on an everyday basis. I don’t want to wake up 20 years from now in a marriage that has no purpose and depth. I don’t want to “just skate by” in this part of my life. The vows we made to each other require more than a passing glance every few months, they need my time and his time so that we can hit our goal – 50 years together!!
If you could rewrite your vows to include some everyday things, what would you include?