Why we won’t have more kids.

Growing up, I always thought I’d have three kids – maybe because I’m one of three and always loved having built-in friends. (I even knew what I wanted their gender to be – if I had any say in it… two boys, then a girl.)

Growing up, my husband always wanted two boys – just like his family.

Then we had two boys and, man, our house got busy and full.  And after some time and consideration, Dean and I decided we were done at two – here’s why:

1 – Time.  I already feel stretched for time with my kids.  Dean and I both work full time, so during the week, we only get a few precious hours of time with our kids.  Sometimes I feel like that isn’t enough and I wish there was more special one-on-one time.  I figure that for our family, I don’t want my kids to have less of my time than they already do.  And I know, most of the time we’re doing things together, but I really love the special one on ones and I already feel stretched at two.

2 – Overwhelmed.  Yes, I am already overwhelmed at two.  I don’t have two little kids, I have two super energetic, messy, chaotic, loud whirlwinds on my hands.  And I love these whirlwinds, but I already feel maxed out and cannot even imagine how I would get by with another one running around.

3 – Just in case.  I know you never want to think about the what if’s, but I always like to err on the side of caution.  If anything were to happen to Dean, I don’t think I could handle having three or more kids to raise by myself.  He does too much for our family and I already have a hard enough time on the weekends when he goes for a golf trip, let alone, forever!

4 – Finances.  Little humans are expensive.  They have childcare expenses now and I’m already seeing our food bill go up.  I want to make sure my kids have every opportunity to do fun activities and get involved in things and to do those things requires money.

5 – Selfishness.  And candidly another reason I don’t want another kid is because I am too selfish with my time and body.  I don’t love pregnancy (even though mine have gone smoothly) and the first year is exhausting for me.  I love having my kids at the ages they are now and I don’t want to go back to baby blobs and nighttime feedings.  I love my stage of life now – funny kids who run around and tell me crazy, silly, imaginative stories and drive trucks all over the place.

<< I was scared to title this post as I did… because I know that ultimately, God can change that ‘won’t’ to ‘will’ but at this point, Dean and I feel like two is good for us! >>


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