The Parenting See Saw

We’ve been having a hard time lately with behavior in our house – from both of our boys.  Disrespect with parents, teachers and other adults.  Not listening. The usual from our 3 and 5 year old.

And so our parenting see-saw sways.  It’s a challenging balancing act.  Finding the right mix of love and discipline. Being stern enough so they know you are serious, but also mixing in enough cuddles so they know that no matter what, you love them unconditionally.

It’s controlled spankings followed by loving hugs.  

It’s taking away privileges while also offering grace.

It’s choosing to speak with patience when internally I am blowing my lid.

It’s the understanding that I have two very different boys who need their mom and dad to love them in similar but different ways.

The see saw is hard. And it’s so easily to slide to one extreme or the other – either over-disciplining or just letting everything slide with never ending freedom.

As I parent, I struggle with my role. Parenting well enough that they aren’t on the shrink’s chair at age 15.  It’s easy to be either extreme but it requires much more patience to find the right balance. And for Brooks, that balance looks different than it does for Landon.  So I really have to zone into their needs individually to find the right parenting fit.  And I haven’t found it yet.  I struggle daily with my parenting choices.

But I know that this is not an overnight process. That’s why God has given me so many years of practice, because he knows it’s going to be a while before I start getting it right.


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